A child doesn't tell you how he did in kindergarten?

Quite often in PEP Mum consultations and the BEA course, I hear parents worrying that their child won't tell them how they did in kindergarten. What does this mean? That everything was fine and there is nothing to tell? Or that the child doesn't want to tell, is afraid?

Nothing can be elicited from a kindergartener to answer such obvious questions: how was kindergarten? What did you eat? Did you behave well?

... Until he starts going to school and responds with a resounding "OK!" or "Nooormaaali.."

Here's an idea of how to ask a slightly different question to make it more interesting for children to answer. This is an approach that other parents and I have called. Down. Opap."

Questions to ask your child about how kindergarten went:

With my son, I call this a game. Coming home from the garden, I ask: "Shall we play up-and-down-and around?" Not only did he always respond, but after a few times he started to suggest playing the game himself.

1. What were you happy about today?
2. What were you sad about?
3. What was it that made you angry?
4. What are you laughing about today?

It is important to start with the happy and end with the happy/funny/funny.

When your child answers these emotion questions, try not to comment or start to argue why they shouldn't feel that way or what they should do to stop feeling that way (if they're sad). Instead, listen and confirm that you have heard.

How about this "How did it go?" question?

If you and your child are yet to start kindergarten, the following will help you prepare Guide to starting kindergarten. In this video course, I answer the most common questions and concerns I have heard from parents during PEP consultations.